SECLUSION FROM A GROUP
Seclusionfrom a Group
Seclusionfrom a Group
Acrossindividuals, societies, communities and eras, people have always feltcomfortable being in a group. In various ways, people seek membershipand inclusion over isolation and exclusion. It is human nature forone to feel a need to belong to a group. Seclusion is the act ofbeing private and away from other people. Seclusion has both positiveand negative impacts to an individual. I have been through manyseclusion experiences and I want to share the most vivid,embarrassing, humiliating experience I went through. Few months ago,I was secluded by my fellow classmates because i disagreed with themconcerning various opinions. The classmates were disagreeing on thestep they were to take concerning one lecturer that had a habit ofmissing classes. Unlike the other lecturers who used to inform thestudents about their absence, this particular one never did it. Themain aim of this essay is to narrate about the seclusion experience Iwent through, the paper will explore what happened and ways in whichI felt secluded.
Accordingto a study that was conducted by Hieber (2015), seclusion comes withmany feelings. Some of the feelings that secluded people feel includeanger, worthlessness, and pain among others. Secluded people may alsofeel rejected and anxious. One of the feelings as a result of theseclusion I experience is that I felt ignored. According to thefellow students, a new lecturer was to be appointed who was tocontinue with the classes. I had a different opinion sinceI feltthat this would have caused much confusion on the students. Iexpected some of the students to support my opinion but none did. Allof them were of the opinion that the lecturer need to be changed andthis made me feel ignored.
Seclusionalso may result in embarrassment and i also realized I had createdunwanted attention. When I was explaining on how we should not letthe lecture be changed because of many issues that would result afterthe change, my fellow classmates were quiet. I explained how thestudents were used to the mode and styles of the lecture and howchange would disorient them. Because of the way they seemedattentive, I thought that they would agree to my recommendation. Itwas until one of them interjected and said that my opinion wasuseless and all the group members argued that my opinion was nothelping them in any way. All the classmates loudly said no to myproposal and this experience highly embarrassed me. I can clearly saythat this is the most awkward and embarrassing moments I have everheard in my entire life. I was extremely embarrassed and I blushed.According to the students, the new lecturer would be told to tryhis/her best and increase teaching speed in order to be able tofinish the remaining topics within the short period of time that wasremaining.
Ialso started feeling uncomfortable after realizing that theclassmates supported one of us proposal over mine. I realized thateven my close friends were for the opinion that the lecturer shouldbe changed. This inflicted feelings of isolation and disregarded. Themain reason why I suggested that the lecture should not be changed isbecause of prior experience. I had seen how changing lecturer in themiddle of a semester disorganized many things and brought a lot ofconfusion.
Additionally,I understood that that our institution had a limited number of tutorsteaching those topics. Such a change means that a different tutorfrom either outside or from within the institution was to be assignedthe roles played by the previous lecturer.Getting a tutor to teachthese topics was a bit challenging since only few had thequalifications required and the lecturer we had had many teachingskills. Since quality was a key consideration in my institution, thisopinion of bringing in a new tutor from outside was not possible.Getting a tutor from within the institution was also anotherchallenge.
Afterexplaining to my fellows students the reasons why we should neverrequest for a change, they secluded me and this made me feel alone.Not only that they disregarded my opinions but they also went aheadand left me. They went towards the class where they came up with aconclusion of caging the tutor. My fellow students took it furtherand they made it a habit of never asking for my opinion in any classdecisions. One day I learned that a certain decision which was verycrucial to me was made without my knowledge. I felt isolated, angry,and disregarded. I also felt guilty and I wished I had never given myopinion about the lecturer issue.
Insummary, I came to realize that human beings are social being whobelieve in belonging to a group. This experience was very tough andembarrassing. One thing that I learned from the experience is thatseclusion by close friends especially the classmate feels very badthan strangers. Good examples of people who got excluded by theirgroups include Barrientos and Stracher. Once involved in such anexperience, one may feel disregarded, worthless, silly, unappreciatedand this calls for other strategy to avoid re-experiencing it.Seclusion is not a good experience and people should come up with anew strategy so as to avoid consequences associated with it. Mydifferent opinion was the main factor that contributed a lot towardsmy exclusion from the rest of the class members.
Hieber,L. L. (2015). Effectsof social isolation and loneliness on social perception. [Nashville, Tenn.] : Vanderbilt University.